What it Takes

This is a super-duper secret sort of post.

I am going to give you the nuts and bolts of what I do, every day to keep my mind-body connection, well, connected.

A side note on learning new stuff- adding new routines and actions to your life is building skills.  The great news about building skills is that we can do it until the day we die (YAY!).  The part that is important to recognize and keep in mind is that it feels awkward and hard when we first learn anything new.  If we can keep that in mind, we can stay curious and open to our experience of learning, as well as be kind to ourselves while we move through the part that feels all weird and contrived.  After a while, it feels like second nature.  That is the beauty of our brains.

So, without further ado, here is my routine for staying healthy and assisting my body in healing.

Morning

The very first thing I do in the morning is 5 minutes of stretching and deep breathing in bed.  I do a quick scan of my body, and do some deep breathing into any parts of my body that feel sore or not so good and offer those parts of my body some appreciation and love. Sometimes, I “sense” clear messages from those parts of my body, sometimes not.  I then do a few stretches.  This practice is a quick way for me to connect with my body, first thing.  It sets the tone for my day.  If I don’t make this happen, it can often lead to a day gone awry.

Next up is a mind dump for 5 – 10 minutes.  I spend time writing, free-form, whatever comes up in my head.  The writing it down part is critical for me to catch the ongoing stories that I tell myself about who I am and the world I live in – often I find that the stories are connected in some way to the pain in my body (in fact, a lot of times the pain I may be feeling in my body will dissipate dramatically during my mind dump).  It’s the negative thoughts and beliefs I’m concerned with – the stories with lots of “can’t”, “should” and “have to’s” thrown in.  This gives me lots of fodder for changing my stories through The Work.

That’s it.  I spend 10 – 15 minutes in the morning, setting my intention to be connected to my body throughout the day.  It’s simple and it feels really wonderful.

During the day

30-minutes of exercise, in some form of fashion, is imperative for a healthy body and a happy mind.  Be it walking in the park or taking a swim, I work to get 30 minutes in per day.  Add to this, a focus on fuel foods: foods that are healthy and support my body.  I’m a big believer in taking care of our bodies through whole foods-focused nutrition to smooth out energy levels and give our body optimum nutrition.  I have a serious sweet tooth, but find that eating more “brown” foods, veggies and lean protein sources keeps those cravings at bay.  That being said – I eat something fun and yummy most every day.  I do not believe in deprivation or a dour, controlling approach to food.

If I find myself feeling stress, with tight shoulders, or a stomach ache at any point during the day, out comes the paper and pen.  I write down what’s happening and again, try and catch the thoughts that are ramping up my stress level.  This might take 5 minutes and it isn’t every day.  Many times, just acknowledging something is stressful helps me to let it go or see it in a different light.  If the thoughts are more persistent, I may run them through the Work.

Evening

After-school is a busy time for most families, and ours is no exception.  Between making dinner, spending time with Clara and Erick, plus wrapping up any loose ends from my day, I often have an achey back by the time I sit down (honestly, this time of the day is most stressful for me).  I spend about 30 minutes connecting  in the evening, unless we have something else happening.  So, I maybe do this 4 or 5 nights per week.

15 minutes of Yoga at a minimum.  (Often, my husband joins me for this, which is lovely) During my practice, I will again have paper and a pen handy for any thoughts that come up during my practice.  I often find, because our bodies are repositories for memories, that I have interesting thoughts come up during my practice.  I’m constantly surprised by this.  I jot down anything that is negative or persistent.

After Yoga, I always do nothing (aka: meditate) for at least 10 minutes.  In my opinion, practicing Yoga before doing nothing, allows the brain to slow down sooner and reap the benefits of stillness.  I personally find it frustrating beyond belief to try and sit if I haven’t practiced some Yoga first, so my body has been “heard”.   This is the most critical part of the mind-body connection, as it relates to healing.  The state of stillness and calm that our minds reach during meditation (or doing nothing) is what teaches us to stay relaxed during everyday situations (we are practicing, right?)  and decreases the anxiety in our bodies dramatically. This allows our bodies to rest and heal, as well as function optimally.  Of course, dealing with the negative thoughts and emotions as they arise during the day is absolutely imperative for this to be as effective as it can be.

Right before bed, I always, always, always write down at least 10 things that I’m grateful for.  This puts me to sleep in a happy and content frame of mind, ready for my body to repair itself and my mind to work everything out through dreaming.

The sum-total

I have had people comment that they can’t imagine how I fit all this stuff into my day, which is why I thought this post would be so helpful.  The total time I take on most days  is much less than you would think-  a grand total of about 1.5 hours spread throughout the day.  I don’t know about you, but I can easily waste that much time futzing around on Facebook each day!!  So what if you already exercise and don’t want to add everything else I’ve listed to your own routine.  What then?  If I were to suggest two or three absolutely, must-have practices, I would suggest everyone add a daily mind dump and daily time doing nothing (or meditating, whatever you want to call it) to their routine.

I will not lie to you.  I have spent years with these practices.  Adjusting our priorities can be daunting and, let me be clear about this.  The days when you DON’T practice are just as important as the days that you do.  It is on those days that you can see the true impact of what you are doing – to really appreciate the effort of staying connected to your body, feeling your feelings, and changing your mind.   Missing a day or even a week isn’t cause to throw up our hands and never practice again.  Nor is it a good time to mentally whip ourselves with the cat-o-nine tails for not following through.  It’s a good time to pay attention and be curious.  To gather information.  Notice if you feel better or worse without your daily practice of connection and awareness. And then do what it takes – with kindness – to start again.

If you are curious about these tools, or if you would like a mind-body healing program designed for you and your unique situation, I would love to work with you!  Right now, as I am working on my life coach certification with Martha Beck, my prices are low so I can help as many people as possible and get as much experience coaching.  There are two types of people I am seeing: I am working with people who KNOW they are under a lot of pressure and are starting to experience mind-body symptoms (chronic back pain, stomach upset, etc) and are ready to take charge and reverse the trend.  I am also working with people who are facing chronic pain and illness to work with their pain, decrease their anxiety (which often leads to a major decrease in pain), and stay out of dirty pain (ie, the pain of “what if’s”).  It’s a powerful process  that works beautifully in conjunction with western medicine.  If you are interested, you can contact me here, or, visit my website to read more about my coaching packages.

Photo courtesy of Kubina via Flickr under a Creative Commons License.